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Forgiving Your Partner After Betrayal

Part Two

written by Mel Menzies May 17, 2019
Forgiving Your Partner After Betrayal

Burying a Fear of Betrayal in the Undergrowth

The trouble is, how well do we ever know anyone? There’s a Bible verse that says: the heart is deceitful above all things. It’s all too easy to conduct a little internal rationale with ourselves, which supports the argument for whatever it is we most want. We do it all the time when justifying our own indulgence – from eating a whole tub of ice cream in one hit to buying two pairs of Jimmy Choo shoes at once. Or, in your case, from believing that someone is the love of your life to (in his case) running up huge debts.

It’s my belief that we can only truly know someone to the extent that we honestly want to know them.

Note that I’m not saying to the extent that they want to be known; although, obviously, that is part of the equation. But the point is that if you are with someone who doesn’t want to be known, in the fullest possible sense, then that is a factor in what you know about them.

In other words, you may know them to be someone who:

  • Either doesn’t know himself very well, in which case he may choose to seek help in order to do so; or you may know him as someone who refuses to acknowledge his need.
  • Alternatively, you may know him to be someone who has something he does know about himself but he chooses to hide it – from you, if not from himself.
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