John Amodeo, PhD, MFT, writes about the power of being yourself and sharing your true feelings to make connections.
Being human means having a longing to connect with others. Intimacy is the felt sense of connection with another person. The important question is this: What does it take to experience warm, safe, and fulfilling connections in our lives?
Some people are attracted to each other based upon an image that’s being projected, such as being “successful,” beautiful, or interesting. But this superficial attraction doesn’t offer the intimacy we desire. Such attractions are short-lived at best. They are destined to curdle into distance and dissatisfaction when people inevitably discover who we really are, including the secret fears, hurts, and challenges we conceal. If we’re not moving toward a rich and alive intimacy based upon a deeper sharing of our innermost lives, we might become rather boring to others—and bored with ourselves.