The shock of a child saying that he or she is gay is equivalent to that of a teenage daughter saying she is pregnant or a son saying he has made a girl pregnant. Parents’ first reaction is normally shock, but shock isn’t a problem. I remember the day I had to call my father to tell him that I totaled his car. He drove to the accident scene, swore at me, and drove away – that was shock. After ten minutes he drove back to the scene, hugged me and told me he was glad that I wasn’t hurt badly – that was love. If you tell your parents that you are gay, they might be shocked, but that doesn’t mean they will reject you. This shock could be over in minutes, hours, days, or even weeks, but in time we get over our shock and move on.
The Rejected Gay Child
What to Do if Your Parents Do Not Accept You
Dr. Brand Doubell is a sexologist, life coach, and relationship therapist in South Africa. He is co-owner and founder of the Cobrastone marriage program, the Cobragay group for helping gay people with rejection, and The Happy Clinic. He studied theology, philosophy and psychology in South Africa and in the Netherlands.