For a long time, I felt resentment toward my husband because it seemed that he was going out, playing golf, having the time of his life while I was stuck with the kids. I felt unrecognized, unappreciated and disrespected for all the hard work I was doing. I felt sorry for myself.
Then I met an older woman who pointed out that I was actually resenting myself and that feeling resentment toward my husband was keeping me in victim mode.
She asked what was stopping me from going out and enjoying myself and I said, the kids, of course. Then she asked what was stopping me from getting a babysitter. I had no answer, and I realized what she was trying to tell me.