I was tired of dating a new man, wasting weeks and even months trying to figure him out. I knew the qualities I wanted in a man. More importantly, I knew the traits and behaviors that I positively, absolutely refused to tolerate in a relationship. Sitting in front of a man on a first date I wanted to know three important things:

• Does he have the qualities I’m looking for in a man?
• Is he concealing a girlfriend or a wife?
• Will his values, lifestyle and aspirations match mine?

These three, non-threatening questions will help you quickly evaluate a guy—and although they are not foolproof (they many not adequately expose a skillful, conning romance artist), these questions can help you decide whether a man is worth more of your time and effort.