I just had a mini epiphany while waiting in the drive-through at Starbucks to get my daily dose of ice tea. The revelation said in no uncertain terms: “You are pretty darn hard on yourself, Brian.” After sitting with that for a few seconds, I then had no choice but to agree. I am hard on myself, and I realized I do it to myself in a variety of ways that are all based on my own personal expectations of perfection.
I can be affected by something as simple as what I choose to eat or how I spend my free time. Let me explain. I eat pretty darn healthy. It stems from all those years of training for Ironman triathlons. I got into a lot of good habits and enjoyed how I felt eating healthy food. So, while I was sitting in the drive-through, I had a desire for a scone. And as soon as I thought about actually making the purchase, I began to feel guilt and shame with myself because it “wasn’t a healthy choice.” I felt like if I ate it, I was not allowing myself to be the best version of me I could be.